I've never had a good Valentines Day. I've always figured they were cursed or I was doomed. It's just a day that never seems to go the way it is planned.
This year is the first year I don't have a Valentine. I figured this might break the string of rough Valentine's Days. Nope. I planned a Single-Ladies Night which turned out to be Eric, Kathryn and me eating lasagna and watching Dead Snow, a nazi-zombie movie.
I am trying very hard to not become cynical, or bitter, or annoyed. I'm trying very very hard to not acknowledge the messages I received today that make me want to respond with "W.T.F?"
But it's hard.
When all I want to do is have someone I can call and tell my good news too, or call and complain to, or even just wrap their arms around me and kiss me on the forehead when I get frustrated over something insignificant. I don't want to be in a relationship right now because God knows I'm not ready for one with everything my heart has been through the past 7 years... but man what I wouldn't give to just have somebody. I'd give almost anything to be kissed softly, and just have someone take care of me... even if it's just for the night.
But that's Valentines Day for you. It always leaves me wishing I had something better... something more. This year it's all that, and more.
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