I know it makes me completely shallow, and vain, but I miss the way I use to turn heads. I know it sounds strange, but it's the truth. When I was younger you could feel the shift in attention when I walked into a room. My presence was known, and it didn't matter if it was a man, a woman, a boy, a child, single, married, gay... their attention was automatically drawn to me. I use to turn heads.
The last few years, I'm not sure what has happened to that fire in me. People stopped noticing me when I walked into a room, I stopped drawing attention. I just started to blend into the background and never made any attempt to change that. I miss that feeling though.
Recently I've connected with an old friend, and it is bizarre how he still sees me like that attention driving force, breaking necks when I walk into a room. The way he describes it is flattering and intoxicating. But it's making me realize that there are those who still see me like her, the me I miss. And this gives me hope that I can one day reach out to her again, and maybe not revert back to her but blend her into a stronger me.
And to my friend: Thanks for making my mornings :)
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