Dear Dim-witted Douchebag,
I realize that is may seem like I am walking around with a "Fuck Me" sign on my back. Despite my attempts to remove the sign, cross it out with magic marker and continue on it just seems to be there, obvious to every male in a 50 mile radius. I am, however, quite positive that there is nothing on that sign that insinuates that I will, in fact, have sex with you, or that sex with me is something you can buy. I understand it might be hard for you to believe, but not everyone can be bought... even if it is for only 30 minutes. Please remove your foot from your mouth so you can walk swiftly away with your three inch tail between your legs.
Sincerly,
You have got to be kidding me.
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Dear DBBMF,
Stop ruining this for me. Seriously, stop taking the things that make this whole experience worth while away. It's bumming me out.
Yours Truly,
The Silent One in the Corner.
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Dear Douche-lord,
Please, stop being an epic douche-lord. It pains me to use such a title for you when I know the deepness of your disdain for the man who was the initial inspiration for such a characterization. It's unappealing, and exhausting, and just time consuming. Stop trying to play mind games. I don't know if you realized it but I haven't been playing back in awhile so you look kind of stupid sitting there playing with yourself.
Sincerely,
Not Budging...
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Dear Dork,
Thank GOD you stopped making things weird. I like this so much better.
Sincerely,
The Sweetest Red Head You Know ;)
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Dear McDreamy,
Circumstance sucks. And I hate missed opportunities almost as much as I hate the thought of Sunday. I love being random with you. Thank you for helping remember what it feels like to be me. I am sincerely and genuinely going to miss you more than I think either of us realize.
With A Lot of Heart,
The giggle queen of your dreams ;)
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