I've been thinking a lot lately about marriage, and commitment. Perhaps it is because of the number of broken relationships I see around me. Friends who are stuck in loveless marriages, friends who are on the verge of separation, friends who have found out their spouses have been having long standing affairs. A once solid, and eternal idea is now becoming temporary.
And this makes me wonder, why? If people lie, and cheat, and break hearts what is the purpose of entering into something permanent like a marriage? Why enter into a relationship with someone, and willing stay in the relationship with them if it's not where you want to be? Married or not. I see it in my friends who are just dating. The same idea, I can't leave... I can't move on... it was good once it can be good again.
I understand the importance of stability. I hear a lot, "I can't leave because of the kids," but don't you think that watching your parents indulge in affairs, and fight, and harbor resentment and disdain for each other is equally detrimental to their development as growing up in a broken home.
I was thrilled when my parents divorced, not because I didn't want them together but because for the first time in years my parents were happy. My mother met and entered into a relationship with the man who she still calls the love of her life, 4 years after his death.
I guess my point is I don't understand why it's so hard to just be happy? If a relationship isn't working... then it's not working. As cliched as it may be, it's called a break up because it's broken. It's a cheesy self-help book, but the title is accurate.
And I realize I might get some backlash for this. Marriage is a sanctity. Marriage is suppose to be forever. Divorce is the Devil. Yeah, it is. I would completely agree with that. But too many people enter into relationships, and marriages lightly. To many times people get married for the wrong reasons (trust me, I could write a book on the subject). Why stay in it if it's broken. Life is too short to be anything less than happy.
So be happy. It really is just.that.simple.
I agree with you so much about this, and I'm a person who believes very much in marriage and commitment, because you are right: I think most people enter too easily into these kinds of commitment these days. I know I am far from experienced when it comes to relationships, but I've seen enough of other peoples' and I know what i would want from my own. I think so many people have ideas of what they want, that just don't match reality, and they are at a loss as to what to do next.
ReplyDeleteSo you are right ma'am, it really is as simple as just being happy. I know it's how I try to live my life.
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