I am a woman. I am a feminist. Do you expect me to apologize? There is no “but” at the end of my statements. I am not defending my mentality, or my ways of thinking. I’m not making excuses for what lies between my legs.
Why does a man’s honor lie between a woman’s legs? At what pivotal moment did the standard of masculinity shift from a man’s ability to acquire land to his ability to take a woman and her virginity? We are not trophies.
Why do we still say, “take a woman’s virginity”? Intelligent, well-spoken women even today make this reference when they are discussing their first sexual experiences. It is always “the man who TOOK my virginity,” but never the “man whose virginity I took.” In that case we say, “I was his first.” As far as I am concerned a thief did not steal my virginity from me. My “maiden-head” was not lost or tricked out of me by the cunning manipulation of the opposite sex. It was not TAKEN from me. I make a point to say “my first” now.
A Salem Junior who lives on my hall told me a story about her father. She tells me how he always encouraged her to do great things, and be what ever she wanted to be when she grew up: a doctor, a pilot, or even a soldier. However, when they would go to the store and buy her erasers for school he would always make her put back the blue eraser and buy a pink one instead. As children we do not notice the influential things that affect our mindsets. As adults it is difficult for us to look back and recognize the mistakes in our paths. Would you understand the difference between the blue and pink eraser?
Why, despite the fact that woman can handle more pain then man, (i.e. child birth) and are still described and determined as the “weaker” and “fairer” sex?
We need to get out of the mindset of male/female separation. In school, from the very beginning of our education, we are taught that “He was the first to” or “He discover” something significant. Where as we also learn that “She was the first WOMAN to” or “She was the WOMAN who discovered” as if her sex alone creates more significance in her incapability to discover and do otherwise.
Do not dismiss woman’s emotional distress and anger on her present state of health. Just because she may be pregnant or having her monthly menstrual cycle does not give a man or a woman right to dismiss the emotions which are expressed. These states do not unjustify a woman’s feelings.
Woman must not submit to male normality.
Woman must not accept, and embrace the separate standards set for men and woman by family or society; domestic, educational and sexual standards that are conditioned into small children. There are young girls who are forced to play house during kindergarten instead of being allowed playing with the boys in the sandbox. This not only creates segregation among children as young as five years old but it encourages the belief that woman MUST marry, must have children, must keep house while men work with their hands. A son and a daughter are exposed to different expectations of them from their parents. If the daughter gets a C it is unacceptable but if the boy gets a C it is the best he can do. These experiences condition females to strive for perfection in fear of being ostracized while as the man can slide by and be accepted as a social norm. A woman is not allowed to be sexual or explore her sexuality because it is unacceptable.
Women are not whores. I have not been with many men, however it takes one to attach such a derogatory term to my name. My sexuality does not decrease my intelligence; it does not make me inadequate or injury my ability to function, work, or live. All it does is cause people to give me looks on the side of the street despite not knowing my name. Women must kill in themselves the desire to be accepted, the desire to fit in socially. “Women must kill in themselves the desire to be loved,” stated Mina Loy in her feminist manifesto. Once women stop defining themselves by what they are not they will begin to associate and discover who they are.
Why do men desire a virgin as a wife, yet do not want to save themselves for marriage? They want purity, yet in the dating world expect their girlfriends to “put out”. This encourages woman being considered whores for their sexual endeavors and men heroes in their sexual conquests. Women must stop living by hypocritical standards.
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